“Do stuff. Be clenched, curious. Not waiting for inspiration’s shove or society’s kiss on your forehead. Pay attention. It’s all about paying attention.
Attention is vitality. It connects you with others. It makes you eager. Stay eager.” – Susan Sontag
The way to pave a smooth transition to life in a new country is by building a support network and making friends. Back at home, you probably had many people to turn to for advice, support, or help in an emergency: friends, colleagues, neighbors, extended family, a religious community and so forth. As you adjust to a new place you must build a new support network.
A person who does this successfully is always someone who plays well with others. You should seek out people you enjoy and spend as much time as possible simply being friends.
This is the time to get out and find people to connect with in your new country. Find people who share your same passions and ideals.
Here are some tips and resources on how to get connected and make new friends:
- Make a list of items that you have wanted to do in your new host country and look for places that have local group activities or classes you could take.
- Look on the internet and in your local community center for gatherings or volunteer opportunities you can investigate and attend.
- Plan to attend at least one gathering this week, whether it is a nature walk, art class, informational meeting, sporting event or a lecture on a subject that interests you.
- Be an observer – Who are you drawn too? Now engage in conversation with people you are drawn to. You can always use the subject matter of the gathering as an easy conversation starter.
- Continue to find other gatherings to attend in different subject matters. An important note: always try and meet people who are hosts to the country you are residing in. While it is good to find groups from your original home country, it is important that you expand out and create a diverse friend base. These people can prove to be valuable information sources.
Here are some websites and places that my clients and I have found for support, gatherings and making new friends:
- One of my favorite websites is www.meetup.com . There’s probably a meeting on here for anything you can think of.
- Contact your Embassy for a list of events being held locally that you can attend.
- Take a course on a hobby you have always wanted to learn. I’ve found that www.hotcourses.com to be the most extensive list.
- Join an expatriate forum website to look for upcoming events. This is also a great way to provide support and make new friends with other expats who may be struggling. I use www.google.com. There are thousands of expat forums available to join which are free.
- Join a sports team, exercise group or join the gym.
- Join a congregation of your religious faith.
- Check your local borough or city council for upcoming events and classes.
- Join a volunteer organization or participate in a charity fundraiser or event. www.do-it.org.uk or www.volunteering.org.uk/
- Join a club that shares your interests.
- If you have young children, join a playgroup to meet other parents.
- Take a regional cooking class to learn how to prepare the local cusine.
- Tourists pay loads of money to get to where you now live – what do you most want to experience in your new host country? Perhaps you can attend historical sites, festivals, cultural events, craft markets, cultural music performances, and theatre. I like to use www.timeout.com to find local events.
So get out there and find your people. Please share below any tips and websites you have found helpful for finding organizations, classes, volunteer oportunities, etc to get connected.
In gratitude,
Kelli Douglas
